My wife and I run a content-based Las Vegas site (LasVegasTravelWizards.com or @LVTWs). We've been polling on Facebook, etc to add some great free attractions to the list. Please let us know if you've gotten any other great ones! submitted by
*The Bellagio Conservatory and Fountains -The Bellagio is one of the most beautiful hotels in the world. Every 3 months they convert their Conservatory to match the season with different floral displays! Our favorite time to walk through the awe-inspiring conservatory is in the morning or late at night when the crowds are practically nonexistent. The famous Fountains still put on incredible free shows that go off every 30 minutes during the day and every 15 minutes from 8pm-12 am most nights!
*The Chandelier at the Cosmopolitan.
*The Wynn Koi Pond - This is a hidden gem. It's in the back right hand corner of the Wynn from the strip. It's a small entrance way that leads to Villas from a special valet. It's so a very calm and peaceful place, mainly because no one knows its there!
*Vintage Sigma Derby Horse Race Games - These games are so much fun! For only $0.25 per bet, you can bet on your favorite long shot horses in this vintage game. There are only two Sigma Derby games left in Las Vegas. You can find one upstairs at The D in Downtown Vegas on Fremont Street and another at the MGM Grand located on the southern end of the strip.
*The Hand of Faith is the biggest golden nugget in existence and can be found on display at the aptly named Golden Nugget.
*The Las Vegas Sign - You definitely will need to drive or take an ubelimo out to this one, but it's worth it for a group shot! Great idea 'OnECenTX' You can make it a scavenger hunt by getting all 3, The other "Welcome to Las Vegas" sign on Boulder Highway and the "Welcome to Downtown Las Vegas" sign on Fremont Street.
*The Mirage Volcano - Goes off at 7,8, and 9 pm most weekend evenings!
*The Blarney Stone The D Hotel and Casino was bequeathed a rare fragment of stone from the famed Blarney Castle in Ireland. Feel free to give it a rub for luck and, while it isn't recommended, no one will stop you from giving the stone a kiss for luck!
*The Flamingos at the Flamingo - The wildlife habitat is located near the entrance to the buffet. While the Flamingos are the stars, it is also awesome to see other animals that have been rescued!
*The Golden Nugget SharkTank at the Pool If you are staying at the pool, you can even go down the slide that goes through the SharkTank.
*The Wynn Waterfall When the sun sets, the Lake of Dreams, complete with an awesome 40 foot waterfall, comes alive with amazing nightly shows. For an unforgettable experience, dine at one of the Wynn's lake front restaurants to enjoy dinner and a show!
*The Fall of Atlantis at the Caesar's Palace Though the crowds can be large at peak times, this show has changed throughout the years and is always fun!
*Music Memorabilia a the Hard Rock Hotel and Casino
*Las Vegas Pools (Our favorites are Caesars, Mandalay, and the Venetian).
*The Linq Hotel Game Room at the Pool - This 21+ pool has so much to offer. While smaller than the other Vegas party pools, The Linq's pool has a very distinctive vibe. It is like a backyard pool party for adults. Let your inner kid rage and enjoy playing beer pong, giant jenga, or visit the clubhouse for free Shuffleboard while getting out of the sun!
*The Fremont Street Experience Honestly, we just love Downtown Vegas and can't say enough about its vintage inspired kitsch. Yes, you will see some crazy things but it is the embodiment of old Vegas' last stand and we support the weird!
*Downtown Container Park - The Downtown Container Park is awesome. It has free games, slides, tree houses, and a giant praying mantis that shoots fire. It's right across the street from the El Cortez (The best BlackJack in town).
*The Gallery featuring Dale Chihuly at the City Center - This is a great stop for some culture on your Vegas trip! There are videos throughout the gallery that show how Chihuly makes his pieces (like the reception display at the Bellagio!). It's free and gallery staff is very welcoming and non-pretentious!
*Clark county wetland park is free and has a visitor center and little museum/exhibit hall.
*The mermaid aquarium at the Silverton.
*Free entry to pinball hall of fame.
*First Friday! Every First Friday of each month, mostly in the downtown arts district where local and guest artists display their artwork. Local bands also perform and food trucks come out as well.
*The animatronic animal show at Sam's Town.
*Main Street Station - Berlin Wall.
*'awesometographer' from the comments below watching Netflix at his/her house, you'll have to Private Message them for the address! JK
NEW THREAD: https://www.reddit.com/PoGoVegas/comments/4uenxg/pokemon_nests_in_vegas/
Please report to this new thread. This has been converted into a Gdoc format that is being moderated by a few users who expressed interest early on. This is to prevent le trolls. Thanks everyone in /PoGoVegas
community for your input, we've really made huge strides!
ORIGINAL POST: The goal of this post is to catalog in an easy to follow reference of what general locations in Vegas have spawns of specific pokes. This is a community project, so please submit in the comments where you've had luck finding specific pokes and I'll try to get in a couple of edits a day. Note that evolves and rares probably won't have a location, but if you've noticed a trend we can still add it. I'm removing evolves to shorten the list. I live on the west side so I mainly have knowledge about my nearby parks. Please let the community know of anything you've got to add! Open to all suggestions. If you can confirm any information I'll try to add confirms to the list as well. Thanks everyone! Please be aware that some listed areas may not be public access (i.e. golf courses, washes, businesses, etc.). Please follow the law, be aware of your surroundings, and help our community's image.
Bulbasaur - Silverado Park 9855 Gilespie St., 89183 (3 Confirm) -- Fox Ridge Park - 420 Valle Verde Dr., 89014 (2 Confirm)
Charmander - Equestrian (Dog) Park - 1200 Equestrian Dr., 89015 (2 Confirm) -- Charlie Frias Park? - 4801 S Decatur Blvd, 89103 -- Sunset Park? 2601 E Sunset Rd, 89120
Squirtle - Mission Hills Park - 551 Mission Dr, 89002 (3 Confirm)
Pidgey - Everywhere
Rattata - Everywhere
Spearow - The Strip/Everywhere (Less Common)
Ekans - Everywhere
Pikachu - Exploration Peak Park - 9700 S Buffalo Dr, 89178 (1 Confirm) -- PRIVATE PROPERTY - Lowe's? - 1401 S Boulder Hwy., 89015 -- Fort Apache between Blue Diamond and Sunset? -- PRIVATE PROPERTY Steiner's? - 1750 N Buffalo Dr #115, 89128 -- Near Rumor Hotel?
Sandshrew - Everywhere
Nidoran♀ - Desert Bloom Park? (1 Negative) - 8405 S Maryland Pkwy, 89123
Nidoran♂ - Desert Bloom Park? (1 Negative)- 8405 S Maryland Pkwy, 89123
Clefairy - Floyd Lamb Park (Early Closure?, 8 PM?) - 9200 Tule Springs Rd., 89131 -- Goett Family Park - 10950 Southern Highlands Parkway, 89141
Vulpix - Lured stops at Desert Breeze seem to yield more than others
Jigglypuff - PRIVATE PARK: The Willows Park? - 2775 Desert Marigold Ln, 89135 -- UNLV Maryland Campus ( 1 Confirm) -- Sunset Park? - 2601 E Sunset Rd, 89120
Zubat - Everywhere
Oddish - West Flamingo Park - 6255 W Flamingo Rd, 89103 (3 confirm) (Be mindful of safety)
Paras - Everywhere
Venonat - Everywhere
Diglett - Everywhere? (Less Common)
Meowth - Everywhere? (Less Common) -- More common at Desert Breeze around lures -- On strip Near Cosmo
Psyduck - Wetlands Park - 7050 Wetlands Park Ln., 89122 (1 Confirm) -- Flamingo Wash? (Address Needed) -- Mirage Volcano/Venetian? (1 Tentative Confirmation) -- Goett Family Park (Long Trail)? - 10950 Southern Highlands Pkwy., 89141
Mankey - Everywhere
Growlithe - Everywhere
Poliwag - Mirage Volcano/Venetian? -- PRIVATE PROPERTY - Rhodes Range Golf/Pond Areas - 20 E Rhodes Ranch Pkwy, 89148
Abra - Everywhere. Relatively increased spawns in Desert Breeze Park (Confirmed) -- Desert Bloom Park? - 8405 S Maryland Pkwy, 89123 (Kadabra reported)
Machop - Desert Breeze Park - 8275 Spring Mountain Rd., 89147 (3 Confirm) -- PRIVATE PROPERTY LV Athletic Club? - 9065 S Eastern Ave, 89123 (Machoke as well?)
Bellsprout - O'Callaghan Park - 601 Skyline Rd, Henderson, NV 89002 (1 Confirm) -- Mission Hills Park? - 551 Mission Dr, 89002
Geodude - Everywhere, Relatively increased spawns in Desert Breeze Park (Confirmed), Silverado Park, Craig Ranch Park, Charlie Frias Park -- PRIVATE PROPERTY LV Athletic Club? - 9065 S Eastern Ave, 89123 -- Desert Bloom Park? - 8405 S Maryland Pkwy, 89123
Ponyta - Everywhere, Relatively increased spawns in Desert Breeze and Sunset Park -- Mountains Edge Regional Park? - 8101 W Mountains Edge Pkwy, Las Vegas, NV 89178 (Rapidash reported multiple nights)
Slowpoke - Flamingo Wash? (Address Needed)
Magnemite - Charlie Frias Park? - 4801 S Decatur Blvd, 89103 -- Sighting at UNLV Rec Center? (Maryland Campus)
Farfetch'd - Asia Only
Doduo - Everywhere
Seel - Paradise Park - 4775 McLeod Dr, 89121 (2 Confirm)
Shellder - Tropicana Casino? -- Lorenzi Park - 3343 W Washington Ave, 89107 (1 Confirm) -- Shadow Rock Park? - 2650 Los Feliz St, 89156 (Be Mindful of Security)
Gastly - Davis Park - 6601-6699 Eldora Ave, 89146 (5 Confirm)
Onix - Shadow Lane UNLV Campus? -- Downtown - 6th & Ogden?
Drowzee - Duck Creek Park - 8650 Pollock Dr., 89123
Krabby - Bellagio Fountains -- Mirage Volcano/Venetian?
Voltorb - Bill Briare Park? (Lure Spawns?) - 650 N Tenaya Way, 89128
Exeggcute - Springs Preserve - 333 S Valley View Blvd, Las Vegas, NV 89107 (Proposed extremely common) -- Sunset Park? 2601 E Sunset Rd, 89120
Cubone - Everywhere (Slightly Less Common)
Hitmonlee - South Tower Park? - 1022 Park Vista Dr, 89138 -- Bruce Trent Park (2 Confirmed) - 8851 Vegas Dr., 89128
Hitmonchan - Downtown - 6th & Ogden? -- PRIVATE PROPERTY Around Grouchy John's Coffee near Desert Bloom? - 8520 S Maryland Pkwy, 89123 -- Summerlin Community Park? - Approximately 2007 Spring Gate Ln, Las Vegas, NV 89134 -- Near Encore Hotel?
Lickitung - Bill Briare Park - 650 N Tenaya Way, 89128 (1 Confirm) -- Woofter Family Park - 1600 Rock Springs Dr, 89128 -- Summerlin Community Park? - Approximately 2007 Spring Gate Ln, Las Vegas, NV 89134
Rhyhorn - Everywhere? (Less Common) - PRIVATE PROPERTY LV Athletic Club? - 9065 S Eastern Ave, 89123
Chansey - Downtown - 6th & Ogden?
Tangela - PRIVATE PROPERTY - Angel Park Golf Course? - 100 S Rampart Blvd., 89145
Kangaskhan - Australia Only
Horsea - The Strip (Near Cosmo?) -- Nevada Trails Park? - 7075 W Mardon Ave., 89113
Goldeen - Bellagio Fountains -- Flamingo Wash? (Address Needed) -- Mirage Volcano/Venetian?
Staryu - Flamingo Wash? (Address Needed) -- Treasure Island? -- Mirage Volcano/Venetian? -- Bellagio Fountains? -- Hard Rock Hotel -- Goett Family Park (Long Trail)? - 10950 Southern Highlands Pkwy., 89141 -- Charlie Frias Park? (sighting) - 4801 S Decatur Blvd, 89103
Mr. Mime - Reserved
Scyther - UNLV Maryland Campus - Harmon & Swenson (Near Intramural Fields)
Jynx - Springs Preserve - 333 S Valley View Blvd, Las Vegas, NV 89107 (Proposed very common)
Electabuzz - MGM Grand
Magmar - Charlie Frias Park? - 4801 S Decatur Blvd, 89103 (Second Sighting, unconfirmed as nest) -- The Platinum Hotel? -- PRIVATE PROPERTY: PT's?? - 61 W Horizon Ridge Pkwy, 89012 (1 Negative) -- McCullough Vista Park?? - 990 Greenway Rd, 89002 (1 Negative)
Pinsir - Pecos Legacy Park? - 150 N Pecos Rd., 89014
Tauros - Bruce Trent Park? - 8851 Vegas Dr., 89128 -- Acacia Park - 50 Casa Del Fuego St, 89012 -- Desert Bloom Park - 8405 S Maryland Pkwy, 89123 -- Acacia Park? - 50 Casa Del Fuego St, 89012
Magikarp - Gary Reese Freedom Park - 850 N Mojave Rd., 89101 (1 Confirm) (Be Mindful of Security) -- Wetlands Park - 7050 Wetlands Park Ln., 89122 -- The Mirage? -- Mirage Volcano/Venetian? -- Hard Rock Hotel -- Sunset Park - 2601 E Sunset Rd., 89120 (1 Confirm, not super common) -- Goett Family Park (Long Trail)? - 10950 Southern Highlands Pkwy., 89141
Eevee - Everywhere - Increased in Desert Breeze Park (Flareon reported Desert Bloom Park? - 8405 S Maryland Pkwy, 89123) -- Increased Rate Near Hard Rock Hotel
Omanyte - Flamingo Wash? (Address Needed) -- Goett Family Park (Long Trail)? - 10950 Southern Highlands Pkwy., 89141
Kabuto - Mariner Dr. & Regatta Dr., Las Vegas, NV 89128 (Near a lake in Desert Shores)? -- Flamingo Wash? (Address Needed) -- The Mirage? -- Goett Family Park (Long Trail) (1 Confirm) - 10950 Southern Highlands Pkwy., 89141
Articuno - Reserved
Zapdos - Reserved
Moltres - Reserved
Dratini - Charlie Frias Park? (Second sighting, unconfirmed as nest)/PRIVATE: The Home Depot/New Orleans Casino across the street - 4801 S Decatur Blvd, 89103/4750 S Decatur Blvd, 89103 -- Teton Trails Park - 7850 N Bradley Rd, 89131 (2 Confirm)
Mewtwo - Reserved
Mew - Reserved
Inspired by: https://www.reddit.com/WritingPrompts/comments/4m1yyj/rf_the_black_market_is_now_a_brick_and_morta
Audio recording Journal Day 444 Date: 4/4/44
Oh no. Oh Jesus. Oh mother. What have I found!? What do I do?! Okay, okay, I gotta calm down. Deep breathes Jordan, deep breathes. Whew, alright, I’m g-good. Let’s begin.
So Boss humiliated me again, as usual, nothing special about that. But this time he did it in front of everyone! Including……including HER. My beloved angel. The way she looked at me after that……I couldn’t stand it! So I-I ran. In the middle of work. I’m gonna get fired this time but who cares! That company….shou-should just be annihilated!
Wait no, I’m getting off track again. Haven’t been taking my meds. They make me sick. Stupid meds with their sparkles and rainbows.
No, that’s not important. What’s important is I found it! It really exists! Black Market! The real one with doors and everything! Except no windows, they got no windows there. Hehehehehe.
No no no no! I’m getting ahead of myself again! Stop Jordan, go back!
So after I left the office. I-I went for comfort food. Even though mother always told me grease and sugar must be avoided. I’m sorry mother. B-But Ramsey’s Sugar Burger! It closed down! Hic….hic…..it..hic….closed…do-down.
-10 minutes later-
I’m….. ok, I’m ok. No more t-t-te-tears Jordan. Mother don’t l-like no cry-babies now. Whew, so, so, I still needed my food. And the building that replaced Sugar Burger stated Black Market. I thought to myself, Market right? There gotta be like fish and stuff. So I….I went in.
Weird scary people for a market. So many guards. So mannnnyyy. And they had lasers and stuff. I saw a Chimera being brought in too. Wonder how it tastes like. Maybe like a Sugar Burger without Sugar? But the guards were nice. They said it was Open Day. Everybody gets free entry. Half price too! Mother will be proud. I became an intelligent shopper.
Hehehehe, coolest market ever! Cooler than those places Gordon goes too. Stupid Gordon.
No Sugar Burgers though, would be cooler with Sugar Burgers. But-but-but, they had solar powered guns! And Faeries trapped in small cages! And Explosion Scroll Spells! The ones that go BOOOOMM! Huehuehuehue, they showed me. Bang and that person just flew apart! In many many pieces! I wished for Boss to be like that. BOOOOMMM!!
Th-Then they gave me free samples! Such nice people! Open Day is gooooood. Funny white powder. Made me float. And then everybody moved so slowly. Hehehehe, it was funny. Funny. But only lasted a while. I think. Not sure. Felt dizzy after using.
DI I buy anything? Wahahaha, S-E-C-R-E-T. Let’s just say it has 7 letters. Starts with a G and ends with a BANGGGGG. Hehehehe. BANGGGGGG. Just like Boss will be soon. Hope he enjoys the present! Only 250 gold for 5 of them. Half price they said. Plus more of that white powder as gift. They said I looked like I needed it. Such nice people.
I went to the meat section after that. Still hungry after scolding. But not sad anymore~ White powder makes sadness FLY~~ away. Maybe it can replace my meds? Gotta ask mother. That would be fantastic.
They sell funny meat. Not like the markets me and mother when too before. Those had piggies and cows and chicken. I didn’t like it. It smelled bad. This one smelled good. Like perfume that my Angel wears. Sweet.
I didn’t want to eat them though. Because they were girls. And mother always said to be nice to girls. Eating them isn’t nice. Still so hungry though. M-maybe mother will cook meat today. But those girls dressed funny. A-and they got tied up. So many cried. It made me sad as well. ….Hic…h-hic…..sniff…Sad is bad. Go-gotta stop. Stop crying Jordon. You won’t become food like those girls. But those poor girls…….
In the end, no food. So many stuff there but no food. No burgers. No sugar. But I saw the Chimera again. They used fancy words for it. Aw-twi-fi-shal they called it. Not good for eating they told me. Hmph, it didn’t look very yummy anyway. I don’t eat non yummy things. Like veggies. Hate veggies too. But mother hits me if I don’t eat them. So I eat them. But I am clever, if she isn’t looking, I throw them away. Hihihihi, Shhhhhhh, mother must not know. Or she will beat me too.
Oh-oh no! They found me! No No No NOooOoOOooo!! Stupid meds! Hate meds! Get away from meeee!!
Audio recording end.
Audio Recording Journal Day 445 Date 5/4/44
That Goddang Stupid Useless Fool of a Jordon!! It’s already his sixth time. SIXTH time I tell you. There has got to be a limit to being lenient. Just because he’s an idiot, I have to TOLERATE him. I have to EMPATHIZE they say. I have to PITY him. Everything he does, he gets away with it. Six times of not taking his meds, in the past WEEK!
And even when he runs out of the OFFICE! Mother just says the world is too harsh on him. The fault lies in the Boss. Tell that to everybody else! All the weird looks I got today when I went in to the office. After listening to 2 HOURS of the vile, disgusting, fat blob of a man lecturing me on work etiquette, I almost wish to go back to that darkness.
Gordon, you have to understand his difficulties. Gordon, he is a nice person. Gordon, he is just misunderstood. HAH, guess where Mr. Nice but Misunderstood Guy WENT! It felt like freakin Thunderbolts zapping my conscious when I found out. Timid, useless, introverted Jordon, spent the whole day in the BLACK MARKET!
Unbelievable, even with rock solid evidence in my hands, I still cannot accept the fact. A receipt of 250 gold for 5 frigging G-R-E-N-A-D-E-S. Not the typical ones. These ones got a little magical upsies. Elemental Grenades. For 250 gold. MY 250 gold for that matter. Stupid bugger never worked a day in his life for that salary.
Unfortunately, there isn’t a WHIFF of explosives to be found around. I checked every corner of the room. The closet, the bathroom, even the air vents. Nope, nothing, nada. I get the jitters imagining Jordon handling explosives. Sure, his death will be an extreme blessing to me, but this body is OURS. Which means if he goes KABOOM, the ELEGANT, MAGNIFICENT, HANDSOME Gordon will also simply……cease to exist. Humanity, no, the entire universe would not be able to cope with that loss.
Despite all the terrible news today, there is a silver lining. The address on the receipt lead me straight to that place. That’s right, I found it! The BLACK MARKET! Goddang Jordon, with half my salary from last month gone, my purchasing power is reduced. MY PRECIOUS GOLD! COME BACCCCKKKK!
Damm, is the medicine’s influence wearing off? Recently people have been noticing. My emotions haven’t been very stable. As if Jordon’s personality surfaces for a second. That freaks me out. Frigging Jordon, as if having to share a life with him wasn’t bad enough, now my very EXISTENCE is being threaten by him.
My only hope is that Market. Heh, amazing place. Every single item, illegal or not, can be found there. Oh my God, that Meat Market, only the price is the problem. DAMMIT, with that 250 gold….Hehehehe. But no worries, the Pharmaceutical Side of the Black Market gave me hope. Hope to ANNIHILATE Jordon!
Somehow, the shopkeeper kept insisting for me to take a look at the Faerie Dust. That kind of stuff just doesn’t have the KICK! Just a simple vertigo feeling and slowing of time. Tch, I got over that stuff a long time ago. Anything weaker then Flamingo Bombs just aint gona work on me. The shopkeeper kept wearing this disbelieving smile. Annoyed the heck outta me. Who DOES Faerie Dust nowadays anyways?
HAH! All those little incidents don’t matter anymore! Because they really produce some! Soul Suppressants! These babies are so illegal that even the Silk Road or Dark Net rarely provides them. These babies are the BIG guys in knockout drugs. Poisons affect the body, these affect the soul! A mixture of scientific knowledge of the mad genius Dena Rescartes and dark magic from Parry Hotter, the famous wizard’s doppelganger.
So close yet so far. Unfortunately, one thing stopped me from claiming the Soul Suppressant, the one thing that Jordon used up buying his PRECIOUS grenades. GOLD! Insufficient lack of funds. Unbelievable. I, the WONDROUS, RENOWN, WEALTHY, Gordon, reduced to the pathetic action of bargaining. Even then, after losing my PRIDE, the drug still stayed out of my reach.
THANKFULLY, the Black Market provides a very convenient service. Money lending! Seems like I’m not the only one with money problems here, thus for a fee, the Black Market is able to provide personal loans as high as up to 9000 gold! There don’t even need a guarantor or mortgage! Perfect timing for someone like me which needed a sudden influx of cash immediately. My luck is FINALLY turning!
After doing all the complicated paperwork they even inquire if my ORGANS are healthy and functioning, I left the money lender a happier man. More importantly, a MUCH richer man! Forget the dang Soul Suppressant, with the gold, even a tank will fall into my hands. Albeit a small one. A total amount of 6000 gold well spent on the drug though. With this, Jordon’s eternal slumber is guaranteed!
HAH! The face of the dealer when I went back. I SLAMMED the sack of gold right under his nose. Wiped off just excrement-eating smirk off his face. WOOHOO! That high felt even better than that PITIABLY Faerie Dust he offered. Made me regret not borrowing more of that gold. Returning it will be a PIECE of cake, no, a CRUMB of cake! Since Jordon won’t appear anymore.
Alright! Enough yammering! Time to take the Soul Suppressant! Lemme just get a cup……some water…… Nope, we won’t be needing the instruction manual……and all set! HERE I GO!
Audio recording end
Audio Recording Journal 448 Date 8/4/44
HAHAHAHA. IT WORKED! The Soul Suppressant WORKED! 3 days since the last recorded entry. Jordon can’t get up! FINALLY…finally….finally!!!! The sole ownership of this body is mine! The sky is a beautiful blue, the sun is wonderfully bright, and today is just brilliant! Makes me feel like reciting poetry!
There was once an annoying soul, That disobeyed orders, never doing as was told, Don’t blame me for being heartlessly cold, Just sleep forever until you grow mold!
Beautiful, just perfect. My artistic talents must have been forcefully awakened by this good fortune. Looks like the next NOBEL PRIZE winner is being reborn right HERE! Good thing I went shopping today. Gotta treat this body of mine with the finest the WORLD can offer. After all, a soul of a MIGHTY poet resides in it. That gold I borrowed turned out mightily useful I must say. Best investment I EVER made. The remains of it were enough to fund a YEAR of living expenses! AND I spent it all TODAY! Well, it couldn’t be helped. I had a much needed celebratory lifestyle to live in. Food, liquor and women. The best that this measly town can offer. I have sampled all of them today!
Those Black Market hounds sure are insistent though. It’s only been a few days and they already started hounding me for the gold. I haven’t even SPENT all of it yet! Crazy buggers already checking in to see if I can pay them back. Well, there were still quite polite, even left some free Faerie Dust. Wonder why they assume I enjoy this stuff.
Hehehehe, anyways that’s all. I ain’t got no time to record no more. Time to PARTY TIL DAWN!! WOOHOOO!!
Audio recording ends.
Audio recording Journal 449 Date 9/4/44
OH GODS! EVEN WHEN HE SLUMBERS HE STILL MANAGES TO MAKE MY LIFE A LIVING HELL!! CURSED! I WAS CURSED THE MOMENT I MET HIM!
Jordon oh Jordon. You really DID it huh. You really did it this time. I wish you had a physical body. If you had a physical body, Jordon, I would be able to beat you until you’re at DEATHS DOORSTEP. I WOULD flay every inch of your skin. I WOULD carve you like a Christmas turkey using a red inch hot poker. I WOULD tear you tendon by tendon and, FINALLY rip you in half.
Let me tell you how it happened, Jordon. I can already hear you SQUEALING in delight once the news reaches you. After skipping out on so many days of work, I obviously had to return. At the very least to tend in my resignation.
The stares of disgust and loathing were even stronger than usual. No doubt because of something YOU had done. Ughh, even the JANITOR looked down on you. I headed to the Boss’s office with the letter all typed out and stuff. We probably didn’t even need a letter, the Boss would fire you without a second thought. Anyways, the main point is that once I entered his office, he was all smiles.
Guess what? Seems like he had just gotten a gift. FROM YOU. Signed with your name and everything. A beautiful jeweled box. Anyone looking at it would guess that it contain a precious gift, or a blatant bribe.
That dung-for-brains Boss actually beamed at me. Even shook my hand. Probably PROUD of you. PROUD that you finally understood how society works. Not that your social cues were always the best huh? It freaked me out, him acting so FRIENDLY. And it didn’t help because you couldn’t have possibly sent that box. So there I was being clutched in that slimy old farts’ disgusting death grip and racking my brains over that puzzle.
SCREW YOU JORDON! You almost got us both killed! And I don’t mean the comatose kind of dead. I mean the death by being blow apart with our guts and entrails plastering the walls. THANK THE GODS I EXCUSED MYSELF. I headed out as fast as possible, not because of my Spidey-Sense, but because that creep made me nauseated. Ironically, his existence saved our lives.
20 FREAKING seconds away from the office. The shockwave hit me. And not just ME. The entire building shook like it had Parkinson. The lights flickered like those old DISCO balls. You got me good this time too Jordon. Let me tell you, I screamed like a little girl. Along with the rest of YOUR co-workers.
I crawled back to the blast zone just to see how MANGLED the body was. HAH, the problem was, there was nothing beyond the office door. LITERALLY NOTHING! Godzilla might as well have taken a bite out of the building. I dunno what those wizards chuck into those little babies you bought, but lemme tell ya, they were the BOMB!
Jordan you INSANE FOOL! Because of that incident, I had to leave the scene as soon as possible and hide myself. I am PRAYING you weren’t STUPID enough to leave any OBVIOUS evidence. Though most of them probably got blown to high heaven as well. No wonder I couldn’t find any sign of those GRENADES. You already mailed them. Or was it a timed delivery? Dammit, it doesn’t matter now. Thanks to you, I have to CLEAN this mess up. Or at least escape without getting caught.
Can’t stay here for too long. Gotta pack up. Those cops will be hunting for the culprit. Jordon that moron, if he was awake it would be even more troublesome. Ughh, just imagining trying to escape with him sends shivers up my spine. I might as well just turn myself in.
OH GOD WHAT DID I JUST HEAR! SIRENS! POLICE SIRENS! Damm Damm Dammmmmmmmitt. JORDON, MAY YOU ROT IN HELL!!!
-Door crashes open in the distant- “This is the police, we have surrounded the place, put your hands up and don’t move!”
Audio recording ends.
Audio Recording Journal 500 Date 10/4/44
8 hours. Been on the run for 8 HOURS! Those frigging cops, even more persistent then summer flies. Except these flies have weapons. And the AUTHORITY to bring me in for questioning. dammit, Dammit, DAMMIT Jordon! Thanks to that filthy scumbag, I’m stuck in the STINKIN SWEWERS!
Unidentified foul matters, oily disgusting sludge, decomposing corpses. Fantastic place. Every time you take a breath, feels like a live battalion trying to assault your nose defenses. The cops actually SAW me enter the sewers. The ONLY reason I haven’t been nabbed yet is because even THEY are reluctant to join me in this pitch black darkness and who-knows-what FORSAKEN creatures.
The only thing I have with me is this STUPID journal….. AND I’m only recording because in case I die eaten by some monstrosity down here, they would be able to write books about me. Telling tales of MY past endeavors! HAHAHA, an entire generation will be able to learn about my greatness to humanity.
But first things first, I gotta find shelter. Tch, a fugitive lifestyle sucks. Preferably by someone unafraid of the authorities. Or at least a place that the cops won’t think of going. Perhaps a place a cops are afraid of going? Underground casino dens? But no, those won’t do. With this body of grime and muck, I’ll be lucky if they don’t shoot me first and ask questions later. And no friends either. Not that I have ANY. Neither does Jordon.
Oh! There IS a place. A place where the cops are unable to enter, and also big enough to hide me. Best of all, they don’t mind a LITTLE dirt! Hahahahaha. The IRONY, I left there with a bag of wealth only to return to it as a mendicant. Fate is playing tricks on me! I ALMOST HAD IT ALL! A BODY, GOLD, A BRIGHT FUTURE, AND STILL LOST IT ALL BECAUSE OF JORDON!
-Sounds of struggle- Ha…..Ha……..ha……. dammit, so they weren’t lying when they said THINGS lived in the sewers. No wonder those cops didn’t follow me down. That THING aint even an animal no more. Gordon….Gordon, you almost played yourself big time. Gotta keep it down. This aint your territory. Now let’s just tiptoe slowly out of this miserable place one step at a time…..
-Snarls Squeaks Growls-
Arghhh!! Help! HELP! Hel-crash-
Audio Recording End
Audio Recording Journal 501 Date 11/4/44
I’m alive. I’M ALIVE! This Gordon is IMMORTAL! Pretty badly chewed up, BUT managed to escape alive. Those sewers are the WORSE. Unbelievable how the city council can let those creatures run amok down there. If they managed to come up…..Ughh.
Heh, anyways, I got rid of the cops! Always wanted to say that. Got rid. Like I MURDERED them! Unfortunately, I merely shook them off my trail. It wasn’t easy but when I emerged from the sewers, a few of those…..critters changed targets.
Well, this place is where it all began. Fitting it should become my sanctuary from the law for the time being. The Black Market has insane security measures though. I saw some P17 drones and Hell Hounds around the entrance. Plus they AINT got any windows. SO how exactly did the amazing Gordon sneak in? With the supreme stealth skills of a master ninja!
Actually, back when Sugar Burger owned the place, they designed a secret back entrance. Rumor has it that it was for the illegal supply of meat they used in their….food. Something about escaping Health Authorities. Anyways, since REGULAR CUSTOMER Jordon got cornered here once by bullies, the owner let him out through the back door. I CANNOT believe that I will be thanking Jordon one day for eating Sugar Burgers. On the other hand, THIS BODY WILL PROBABLY DIE OF CANCER BECAUSE OF THOSE GODDANG BURGERS!
I got a bit lost for a moment, finding the entrance. The description in Jordon’s journal……well, WE all know how WELL Jordon does his journals. Heck, if it wasn’t for mother forcing us to do it, we would probably happily toss this thing into the river. “Communication is the key Gordon” “Learn to accept one another Gordon” and all that hippy whatnot lead to mother handing over this device for us to…..better UNDERSTAND one another.
But that’s all in the past now. HAH! Why understand each other when you can just get rid of the ones bothering you, right? Now it’s just me in this body, albeit a dirty munched on one, but MINE. Thanks to that wonder drug. Speaking of which, I didn’t expect the Black Market to have office hours. Guess even drug dealers, slave peddlers and arms merchants need a healthy work life relationship as well. HEHEHEHE, that means I have this whole place to MYSELF!!
I always wanted to check those solar powered rocket launchers! And eat the endangered species Kuali Bird Meat! Oh my God, this case has the skull of the last necromancer Kul-Tha-Han. If I get my hands on it…..I could summon armies of undead! Next to it is…..a corpse? Holy…#$%, a corpse of an Abomination Snowman.
Huh? Why are there sounds from this crate?
Huh? Why is the crate opening?
Huh? Why am I staring at a Hydra?
SOMEONE SAVE ME! A friggin Hydra! Nine headed Hydra! The stuff of legends. WHO IN THE WORLD WOULD PUT THE STUFF OF LEGENDS IN A HUMONGOUS CRATE!?
-Sounds of panting- -sounds of death looming-
IS THIS KARMA?! IS IT!? Just because I wanted a body to myself! Is that too MUCH TO ASK FOR!?
-Sounds of rapid footsteps- -roars of anger-
Whew….finally. Thank god for its stupid big arse body. It can’t fit through the warehouse door.
HAH! In your FACE Karma! Whatever you threw at me, Grenades, Police, Mutated Unidentified Rodents, even the friggin Hydra can’t take me down!
Well…..I am stuck in this dank warehouse for the time being though.
Audio recording end
Audio recording Journal 502 Date 12/4/44
Haha…ha….ha….. What the heck……
Looks….like Karma didn’t give up.
Finally got me huh.
The Hydra ain’t scary at all. Nothing compared to us human beings. They at least act on instinct. We humans, are monsters.
This….is…probably my last entry. They got me. Soon, I will be a living corpse.
I hid in the warehouse until dawn. After a few hours, the Black Market Security noticed the Hydra. Kinda hard to miss a 5 feet tall monster but I guess they had better things to do….. I gave my blessings, as if the nightmarish week finally came to an end. Oh it came to an end alright, the week, along with my life most likely.
After removing the Hydra. They took me into custody. I kept explaining to them that they made a mistake. All I got were stone cold stares. Are they even human?
They flung me into a cell. Like a dungeon. Then a familiar face appeared. That person, THAT PERSON! Unbelievable! How could that even be possible! Even now I cannot accept it. There has got to be some mistake! I AM GORDON! THE INTELLIGENT ONE! THE GREAT GORDON! HOW COULD I LOSE TO YOU!!!!!!
Ha….ha……ha……hehehe…..AHAHAHAHA…… That’s right, of course that face was familiar. I see it every day. Those squinty eyes, chubby cheeks, pug nose. Only the hair, that hideous hair. Always hated the blond color. But he liked it, he always loved it. Didn’t you?
Impossible ain’t it. But it’s true. EVERYTHING! EVERYTHING WAS PLANNED! The receipt leading to the Black Market, the timing of the bomb at the office, framing me for murder, leaving me no place to go but here. Everything wasn’t a coincidence.
He still talks the same way. Stutteringly nervous. Twitching. Sweating. I always grimaced watching those family antique videos where he was in it. Always thought that such an inferior being shouldn’t even exist. Heh, now I am the one belted to the operating table. Looking even more pathetic them him I bet.
Ahh, he’s here. Oh my gawd, please Jordon, spare me. I am your other half. We share the same body. Don’t do this. Please……MOTHER SAVE ME! I DON’T WANT TO DIE! STOP HIM!
Audio recording end.
Audio Recording Journal 503 13/4/44
Hehehehehe. I-It’s me ag-again! Si-silly Gordon is now bye-bye. Ohhhh, we sliced him up into incy wincy strips. Bu-But of-of course we harvested all the organs possible. It wasn’t cheap to set up the trap. Huehuehue
Always making me feel sad. Calling me stupid. Wh-who is dead now HUH?! Hehehehe, but technically Gordon still lives. Oh yes he lives. But he sleeps. Sleeps so deeply inside. Huehue, the drug….Soul….Suprisent? Makes him sleep…..forever.
Didn’t know…..he knew about it too. Took it and force other body Jordon to sleep forever. Boohooo, poor other Jordon. It’s Okay now, I got revenge, other body Gordon has died. I WON!! MOTHER I DID IT!!!
Oh no, oh no, can’t let mother find out. Oh no, oh no, she will be mad. Always wanted us to get along. Heheheh, it’s too late now.
Urghh, so much pain. This Black Market is soooo awesome. Better then Sugar Burger now.
The first day I came here, I also borrowed money. Hehehehe, to hire an assassin, to kill Gordon. But I said I wanted to live. Hehehehe, his face was f-funny. But the plan worked! I-it worked so well! Amazing!
First they brought me to this weird room. They said there were gonna clune? Klon? Clon? I can’t remember the word. Anyways th-they wanted to make another me. Hehehehe, afterwards, it was funny looking at myself walk and move.
Then, they made me swallow the weird pill. It tasted bad, not like the white powder. I like the white powder. They said that the Gordon in me would sleep forever then. Hahahaha, no more Gordon~ No more Gordon~
Finally, they set the trap for Gordon. I didn’t get it though. Complicated. Not good with complicated stuff. But, but, but, they bombed the Boss. Woohoo, that was great.
Then Gordon appeared here. Hehehehe, then….I….KILLED…him. He…hehe…..hehehe…..AHAHAHAHA.
Mr Assassin took the money I borrowed, and also other Gordon’s body parts to sell. He told me I get discount, because interesting job. Yay! Mother is going to praise me again for being an intelligent shopper. Oh wait, no, no, no, can’t let mother know about this.
Now, now, JORDON IS FREE FOREVER! No more stupid Gordon being mean. No more sharing bodies. No more having to be nice to Gordon because Mother said so. Now, I AM JORDON FOREVER!
Oh! I’m hungry! Time to get a SUGAR BURGER!
Audio recording ends.
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